Whilst funerals are generally sad occasions, they bring closure for many of the loved ones who stay behind.My own Mom's funeral was held in November. She had a long life: spending 88 years in this world and 51 with me.
It is difficult to organise an event like this when you are grieving. My mom's funeral was that much more difficult since I was so close to her.
I tried to organise around the idea that her funeral should remind us of her and should provide the opportunity for many of us to find closure.
Today's post is primarily meant for the benefit of my family, but is also to say thank you for friends, across the globe, who have been my cyber-support-structure during this time. I am so immensely grateful for your love and support!
The photograph which we selected for the front of the order of service, was a photo taken last Christmas day. It was one of those special photographs - a moment captured in time - impulsively - when Mom was unaware. She was so happy that day. I had hoped that this would be the image which we would all remember - a happy person.
Flowers have somehow become my own way of expressing my grief. I need them to say something about that person. I had chosen soft pastels for all the arrangements - since Mom was a gentle person. She loved beautiful things and especially flowers. I would often bring her small posies of flowers, from my garden, for her little room in her retirement village. She always expressed joy in receiving them.
At her funeral, I organised that the flowers in the vases be made up in 50 little posies (put together in the vases) which were later given to each resident at Mom's village. She would have loved that - a gesture of thanks for their friendship and love during her time there.
Mom's funeral was held at St Paul's lutheran church in Johannesburg - a church adjacent and connected to her retirement village.I was initially really worried about the venue. Mom had spent most of her life in a small farming community away from city life. Elaborate, modern churches buildings don't quite reflect the intimacy with which I associate her. It is ironic that the church building at her funeral was small and intimate. Modern amenities of electronic sound systems, etc, were distinctly absent. Although this church is in a city, once you step inside, it feels like you are completely away from city life - in a place where you can find personal space for youself and your God.
The music was solely organ music...played on a magnificent old organ which took prime position in the loft of the sanctuary. Indeed, I don't think many of the congregants saw it...they merely heard it!
Some of you may know that Mom played the organ for many years at her local Anglican church in the little village of Duiwelskloof. So it was befitting that the music be traditional organ music.
The artwork on the beautiful stone alter was exquisite! - depicting recognisable biblical scenes.
The Church had really high walls - creating a cool environment inside the building.
The artwork on the beautiful stone alter was exquisite! - depicting recognisable biblical scenes.Mom was a practicing Christian throughout her life.
Artwork reflecting biblical times was displayed throughout the sanctuary.
It was really beautiful!
The Church had really high walls - creating a cool environment inside the building.The Crucifix in the front of the little church was also the artwork of one of the members of their congregation.
My cousin presented a moving eulogy and tribute to my mother. In words, he painted a picture of her life and her loves. He also read out some very touching tributes written by her 7 grandchildren.
Thank you, Doug, for being our strength at that time!
The service itself was traditional and comforting - and supported with hymns that my Mom was familiar with.
A number of family and friends travelled from far to be with us at this time.
We are so grateful for their participation, love and support.
MILDRED IRA POHL25 May 1921 - 14 November 2009
(To Mom, with love)
I saw the dawn
on a sorrowful morn'
You were gone
and we were forlorn.
It was peaceful, painless,
you simply slept,
as we remained shocked
and silently wept.
Your life is done,
you'd certainly been whole.
You've gone to another place
to deliver your soul.
The memories I cherish,
it was meant to be.
Fly now, Mom...
At last you are free!
Caryl Moll
26 November 2009
Finally, I want to thank Ann for the magnificent bouquet of proteas which she gave me at the time. She might not know this, but proteas are a symbol of strength to me.
Thank you!
So....funerals, although a sad time, bring closure to many folk. My mother had a long and happy life. She loved her family immensely.
We will cherish her memory forever!
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